A powerful Grimoire . Its name is a portmanteau of " Necronomicon " and " Telecom ".
Since the "Necronomicon" is sometimes referred to as "The Book of Dead Names" or "The Book of The Dead", "Necrotelecomnicon" could be translated as "The Book of Dead Telephone Numbers" or simply "Phonebook of the Dead". The book is also known as the ''Liber Paginarum Fulvarum'', Latin for " The Book Of Yellow Pages ". It lists all the old, dark God s of the Discworld (i.e. the Things from the Dungeon Dimensions ). The First Edition, kept in the basement of the Library of Unseen University , has been known to eat readers. It is said that any man who reads more than a few pages will die insane, which works out fine for the Librarian ; he is an Orangutan and thus, not a "man".
It was written by the Klatch ian mystic Achmed the Mad, who apparently preferred to be called ''Achmed the I Just Get These Headaches'', (a parody of H.P. Lovecraft 's mad Arab Abdul Alhazred ) after drinking too much Klatchian Coffee . Achmed is also the author of ''Achmed The I Just Get These Headache's Book of Humorous Cat Stories'', the writing of which was said to have driven him mad in the first place.
Grimoires called ''Paginarum Fulvarum'' ( Yellow Pages ) also appear in '' Good Omens '' (co-written by Pratchett and Neil Gaiman ) and Gaiman's '' Sandman '' comic book. Pratchett calls it a "shared joke", and in the dedication to '' Equal Rites '' thanks Gaiman for lending him the last surviving copy of the book.
The is the Creator 's own Grimoire and thus the most powerful book of magic on the Discworld . Despite its importance, its appearance is rather plain; it is a large, yet unimpressive book bound by brown leather, with an illustration of Bel-Shamharoth on the cover.
It was reputedly left behind, with characteristic absentmindedness, shortly after the Creator completed his major work. The Eight Great Spells that initially made the Discworld are imprisoned on its pages, giving the book Sentience .
It somehow came into the possession of Unseen University , where it was stored in a little room off and under the University's Library. Given the nature of the book, the room is full of precautions; not so much for the protection of the book as much as for the protection of its visitors. The walls are covered with protective symbols and lead octograms (a reference to precautions taken to shield Nuclear Reactor s; Pratchett once worked for a power generation company). On the floor is the Eightfold Seal of Stasis, generally considered in magical circles to have all the stopping power of a well aimed half-brick. Even with all these measures, no one may stay in the room for more than 4 minutes and 32 seconds, a figure deduced after two centuries of cautious experimentation. It also seems likly that the Octavo is more than cappable of ignoring these procautions, as it would seem that it did just that to alow Rincewind access to the spell (see below).
The Octavo is attached (perhaps a more accurate term would be "tethered") to a lectern in the shape of an unpleasant winged creature by a very heavy chain fastened by eight padlocks (one for each Head of each Order of Magic). It is also held shut by metal clasps.
While on his first year at the University, Rincewind the wizard tried to open the Octavo for a bet; he miraculously succeeded to bypass all safety measures and open the book, whereupon one of the Eight Great Spells leapt from the book and lodged itself into his mind. No wizard could coax it out. Rincewind was expelled from the University since he was unable to learn any other spells, which were afraid to share his head with one of the Eight Spells. Eventually, the Spell returned to the Octavo and Rincewind said all of the Spells to prevent the Discworld's imminent destruction (as described in '' The Light Fantastic ''). The book was subsequently swallowed by Rincewind's Luggage , but it was spat out a few days later. Presumably the Octavo has returned to its chamber at the University.
Given its size, it seems unlikely that it is an actual Octavo .
- ''130 Days of Pseudopolis'' - (parodies '' 120 Days Of Sodom '' by the Marquis De Sade ) ('' Pyramids '')
- ''Achmed the I Just Get These Headaches's Book of Humorous Cat Stories'' - Achmed the Mad (aka Achmed the I Just Get These Headaches) ('' Moving Pictures '')
- ''Almanack de Gothic'' (Information on Überwald ian nobility; parody of the '' Almanach De Gotha '') ('' The Fifth Elephant '')
- ''The Amorous Adventures of Molly Clapper'' (probably a parody of '' Moll Flanders '' by Daniel Defoe ) ('' Night Watch '')
- ''Among the Snow Weasels - K. Peirpoint Poundworth ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Anecdotes of the Great Accountant s'', Vols 1-3 ('' Night Watch '')
- ''Anima Unnaturale'' - Broomfog (a Bestiary ) ('' Sourcery '')
- ''The Book of Om '' ('' Small Gods '', '' Carpe Jugulum '')
- ''Book of Unusual Days'' - Waspmire ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Boots and Teeth: A Soldier's Life'' - General Sir Rodney Purdeigh ('' The Discworld Mapp '')
- ''The Bumper Fun Book'' - Guild of Fools ('' Wyrd Sisters '')
- ''Chaffinch's Ancient and Classical Mythology'' (parody of '' Bulfinch's Mythology '') ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Cooking in Dire Straits - Superflua Raven ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''The Country Diary of A Gentlewoman'' (parody of ''The Country Diary of An Edwardian Lady'' by Edith Holden ) ('' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''Dangerous Mammals , Reptiles , Amphibians , Birds , Fish , Jellyfish , Insects , Spiders , Crustacean s, Grasses , Trees , Mosses and Lichens of Terror Incognita '' (A book series of at least 29 volumes with 3 parts to each) ('' The Last Continent '')
- ''Diseases of the Dragon '' - Lady Sybil Ramkin ('' Guards! Guards! '')
- ''The Edible Architecture of Bergholt Stuttley Johnson'' - Startup Nodder, FAMG, AitD ('' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''Encyclopedia of Soup'' ('' Wintersmith '')
- '' Fairies , and How To Avoid Them'' - Miss Perspicacia Tick , ('' A Hat Full Of Sky '')
- ''Gd Tak 'Gar'' (''The Things Tak Wrote'') - translated by W.W.W. Wildeblood ( Dwarfish creation myth), '' Thud! ''
- ''Grim Fairy Tales'' - Agoniza and Eviscera Grim ('' Thief Of Time '', '' The Amazing Maurice And His Educated Rodents '')
- ''Guide to Impossible Buildings'' - W.H.J Whittlbey ('' Death's Domain '')
- ''The Guild Houses of Ankh-Morpork '' - Startup Nodder, FAMG, AitD (''Thieves' Guild Diary'')
- ''Habits of the Wolves'' - Captain W.E. Lightly ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''A History of Hats'' - F.G. Smallfinger ('' Going Postal '')
- ''Household Medicine, Hair Care, and Simple Surgery'' - Dr Peristyle Slack, Guild of Barber Surgeons ("Medical Notes" article)
- ''How to Kille Insects'' (A book of some 2,000 pages) - Humptulip
- ''Inne Juste 7 Dayes I wille make You a Barbearian Hero'' - supposedly by Cohen The Barbarian ('' The Light Fantastic '')
- ''Inoffensive Reptile s of the Sto Plains '' - Walnut ('' Hogfather '')
- ''The Joye of Snackes'' - Nanny Ogg (credited as "A Lancre Witch") ('' Maskerade '', '' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''The Koom Valley Codex'' (parody of '' The Da Vinci Code ''), '' Thud! ''
- ''Maganevatio Obtusis'' ("Witch-hunting For Dumb People ") ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Mother Ogg's Tales for Tiny Folk'' ('' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''Mr Bunnsy Has An Adventure'' and sequels (parody of '' The Wind In The Willows '', '' Peter Rabbit '' etc.) ('' The Amazing Maurice And His Educated Rodents '')
- ''My Family and Other Werewolves '' (parody of ''My Family and Other Animals'' by Gerald Durrell ) ('' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''My Life Amongst the Sponge-Eating, Coral-House-Dwelling Pygmies'' - General Sir Rodney Purdeigh ('' The Discworld Mapp '')
- ''Nooks and Corners of Ankh-Morpork'' - Miss Amelia Cram ('' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''Passion's Plaything'' - Marjory J. Boddice ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''The Omninous Encyclopedia'' ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Sieges and Survival'' General Callus Tacticus ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''The Servant'' - Lord Havelock Vetinari (unpublished) (pastiche of Niccolò Machiavelli 's '' The Prince '') ('' The Discworld Companion '')
- ''The Show Judges' Guide to Dragons '' - Lady Sybil Vimes
- ''The Shuttered Palace'' - Translated from the Khalian by A Gentleman, with Hand-Coloured Plates for the Connoisseur in A Strictly Limited Edition ('' Pyramids '')
- ''Some Observations on the Art of Invisibility'' - Lord Winstanleigh Grenville-Pipe (out of print, even the engravers plates have been melted down)('' Night Watch '')
- ''Sundered Hearts'' - Marjory J. Boddice ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Survival in the Snow'' - T.H. Mouseholder ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Synonyms for the Word Plimsoll '' (A book series) ('' Going Postal '')
- ''Thoughts from a Country Garden'' - Miss Epetheme Small ("Medical Notes" article)
- ''Torquus Simiae Maleficarum'' (The Monkey Wrench of Witches, a parody of the '' Malleus Maleficarum '') ('' Carpe Jugulum '')
- ''Toujours, Quirm '' (parody of ''Toujours, Provence '' by Peter Mayle ) ('' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''Twurp's Peerage'' (Information on Sto Plains nobility; parody of '' Burke's Peerage '') (various)
- ''The Unexpurgated Dictionary'' ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''What I Did On My Holidays'' - Twoflower ('' Interesting Times '')
- ''Where's My Cow?'' (winner of the Ankh-Morpork Librarian's Award section ) ('' Thud! '', '' Where's My Cow? '')
- ''Why Things Are Not Otherwise'' - Crumberry ('' Wintersmith '')
- ''Wormhold's Steerage'' ('' Nanny Ogg's Cookbook '')
- ''VENI VIDI VICI: A Soldier's Life'' - General A. Tacticus ('' Jingo '')
All the following books appear in ''.
- ''Ascent of Man'' by The Rev. Charles Darwin
- ''Farewell My Lovely Falcon''
- ''The Hunchback King'' (play) by Arthur J. Nightingale
- ''King Rufus III'' (play) by Arthur J. Nightingale
- ''The Origin of Species'' by The Rev. Richard Dawkins
- ''The Short Comedy of Macbeth'' (play) by Arthur J. Nightingale
- ''Theology of Species'' by The Rev. Charles Darwin
- ''Watches Abroad'' by Preserved J. Nightingale
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