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Milhouse Mussolini Van Houten
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Male
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Blue
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10
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Student at Springfield Elementary, Warehouse Security Guard, Private Italian Tutor, Actor in the Radioactive Man film
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Father Kirk and mother Luann
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A November 1989 Butterfinger commercial
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is Bart Simpson's best friend, the son of
Kirk and
Luann Van Houten , and is most distinctive for his extreme
Nearsightedness requiring thick glasses to correct. Despite being considered a
Nerd , Milhouse is shown to have just-average intelligence with poor people skills. He is constantly led into trouble by the mischievous Bart, who is not shy about taking advantage of his naïve and trusting friend. On one occasion, Bart got Milhouse to be on the
America's Most Wanted list. Milhouse is one of the few residents in Springfield that have eyebrows. He is voiced by
Pamela Hayden .
Milhouse harbors a hopeless crush on Bart's younger sister,
Lisa , and he is usually clumsy around females. However, in one episode's flashback (during the time that Bart and Milhouse were in kindergarten), a school counselor accidentally revealed that he had assessed Milhouse to be
Gay .
Milhouse was named after
Richard Nixon (whose middle name was Milhous) and, apparently,
Charles Manson follower
Leslie Van Houten . (There is also a street named Van Houten Avenue in
Portland, Oregon , where
Matt Groening grew up.) His middle name (established in "
The Last Of The Red Hat Mamas ") is Mussolini, apparently after former
Italian fascist dictator
Benito Mussolini . Presumably his mother's side of the family is
Italian , while his father's side, judging from the last name, is likely
Dutch . The family name was first used in the third season episode "
Homer Defined ."
Milhouse is frequently the target of the bullies
Jimbo ,
Dolph , and
Kearney . They often put him into situations in which Milhouse comes out extremely hurt. He is also the subject of
Nelson 's cruelty: "stop (hitting, zapping, etc.) yourself".
Milhouse is fluent in
Italian due to visiting his
English -language-hating grandmother Sofie two weeks every year in
Tuscany . His uncle Bastardo was the illegitimate child of Milhouse's grandmother and a
U.S. Army soldier during
World War II . Due to his grandmother's beatings, Milhouse learned Italian and started to wet his bed. He has also demonstrated that he is skilled in (if not legally entitled to) operate a
Vespa (with pillion passenger) on public roads. It is also in this episode that Milhouse had come closest to wooing Lisa, as she even kept a picture of Milhouse in her room while practicing Italian. It is implied that she is captivated by his impressive command of the language, and a rather romantic outing to the local Italian immigrant establishment. However, he once again reaches a roadblock due to his ongoing fatal flaw when it comes to girls. Milhouse has exhibited a tendency to begin acting rather ridiculously
Masculine complete with
Clichéd catch phrases and mannerisms. This case of social anxiety has lost him Lisa's heart three times, as well as a relationship with
Rainier Wolfcastle's daughter.
Milhouse's first
Girlfriend was
Samantha Stanky , a new student who had moved to
Springfield from
Phoenix, Arizona in the episode "
Bart's Friend Falls In Love ". After her father catches her and Milhouse
Kissing , he sends her to an all-girls
Catholic School .
In various episodes set in the
Future , Milhouse has been seen as a balding manager at the
Springfield Nuclear Power Plant , a
Cabinet Secretary to
President Lisa Simpson, and (in Bart's words) a teenaged "emotionally-crippled mini-
Hulk ". It has also been suggested that Milhouse will betray Bart, causing severe religious turmoil one thousand years later. If the predictions made by a fortune teller in
"Lisa's Wedding" come to pass, it is also hinted that Lisa loses her virginity to Milhouse, but, according to Marge, he "doesn't count."
- "Everything's coming up Milhouse!"
- "So this is what it feels like When Doves Cry ."
- "Look out Itchy ! He's Irish !"
- "I'm not a Nerd , Bart. Nerds are smart."
- "Remember Alf ? He's back! In Pog form!"
- "Why do ''you'' have a Social Work er? ''I'm'' the one with Stigmata ."
- "It's called Lice , and it's nothing to be ashamed of!"
- "I'll kick your butt! ''(pauses)'' At Nintendo ."
- "Remember the time Santa's Little Helper ate my goldfish? And you lied and said I never had goldfish. Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? ''Why did I have the bowl?''"
- "Not only am I not learning, I'm forgetting stuff I used to know."
- "But I'm all Milhouse! Plus, my mom says I'm the handsomest guy in school!"
- "Well, if your at the bottom of the ocean?"
'''Milhouse:''' "Oh, it can swim! It's even got wheels, in case you die in the desert and have to drive to the cemetery."
- "How could this happen? We started out like Romeo And Juliet , but it ended up in tragedy."
- "You promised fudgicles. So, where are the fudgicles?"
- "A movie with just two women?! Who'd want to watch that?"
- "So how's it feel to ride a girl's bike?"
'''Milhouse:''' "It's disturbingly comfortable."
- "I'm a real human boy! I have feelings, just like you!"
- "But my mom says I'm cool."
- "Their hands were everywhere."
- "I can't wait until we're teenagers. Then we'll be happy."
- (Sitting at gun controls of jet fighter plane) "BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM!!! Take that Mom! Take that Dad! Send me to a psychiatrist would you?! Take that Dr. Sally Waxler!" ''(presses the eject button)''
- "The Statue Of Liberty ? Where are we?!"
- "The 'House always wins!"
- "I'm cool!" ''(after Dolph says that biking with your eyes closed is cool...leading to an accident involving a Train )''
- "Hey, Bart. Check out my new earring. Pretty cool, huh?"
'''Bart:''' "Milhouse, my Mom wears earrings. Do you think she's cool?"
"No! I think she's hot! Sorry, it just slipped out."
- 'I can't go on, you two go. And carry me with you!'
- "Once again I must sugar my own churro."
- "You told me we were going to Red Lobster !"
